Somehow I didn't realize how quickly wedding planning would start. We're looking at January 2006 for the wedding. A little long to wait, but with two family weddings between August and October and then the holidays, it's really the soonest we could do it - unless it got thrown together in three months from now! I think Rick's as excited as I am - and Preslee is thrilled too. She got a ring and necklace set when I got my ring, and was asked to wear it to the wedding. There's so much to do, I'm not sure where to start.
The holidays are over, and now comes cleaning up! Once life and the house are back to normal, and I get my wedding planner I ordered, I'll feel much more together. Until then I'm just enjoying the wonder of the little sparkly thing on my finger!!! (Boy, does it sparkle!!) Rick, Preslee and I spent New Years Eve with Nikki and her family - hanging out and watching tv. I've asked Nikki to be my Maid of Honor, and she's already ahead of me planning I think!
Thursday, January 12, 2005
Wedding planning is starting to get into full swing! We've narrowed down the date to January, 2006, either the 21st or the 28th - now we just have to check availability of places and the church. Rick's been killing himself at work this week, and I'm doing nights, so this week has been a bust. I'm working on the website though!
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Moving right along. This is almost too easy. The date is set, the church and reception hall are booked and I found my dress already. Mom and I went out shopping just to get an idea what was out there and fell in love with the first dress I tried on...I think it was meant to be. It's a discontinued style and it was the only one in the store (or any of their other store locations) and it was in my size. I pick it up on the 4th! We'll do fittings in the fall. The bridal party is coming together too. Sheesh!!
Work is good - continuing to teach me something new every day. This past week must have been cancer week - I had one patient that I had a hard time taking care of. She had breast cancer in 2003 and hasn't been feeling well - turns out she's got cancer all over - all her major organs including her brain and her bones. It's so sad....she's only in her 50s. I'm learning how to handle my emotions better regarding the really sad cases - but it's still tough.
Friday, February 4, 2005
Ok so Mom and I went to look at dresses for the first time last weekend...and found one. I picked it up today! This is so exciting. I got pictures and everything, so if you wanna see....email me!! I've made some progress on the bridesmaids too. If I could find a reception hall, I'd seriously think about moving things up to this spring!!
Monday, February 14, 2005 - Happy Valentine's Day!
Congratulations to Nikki who starts her new job tomorrow! Things here are chugging along. Work, sleep, work, sleep...seems like all I do. I guess it's the usual for mid-winter. Nothing out of the ordinary going on. Wedding plans are moving along, although updates to the site are a little slow - still waiting for pictures and bios from people!
Wednesday, February 16, 2005 - 2 Years!
Rick and I first met online 2 years ago today - and I got Balu 2 years ago today. One of them seems like it flew by in a second, and one feels like it's been a lifetime.....
Sunday, March 13, 2005
I've been horrible about updates!! This week was Preslee's 9th birthday and Mrs. G's birthday too, so today we had cake and ice cream up at the Gallagher's house. I made a doll cake for Preslee and a giant chocolate cake for Mrs. G...I think everyone enjoyed them. I'll put up pictures. Wedding plans are coming along - met with the florist last week. Still 10 months to go, so it seems like an eternity!!
I haven't written in a long time about work - I think in some ways that's been my way of dealing with some of the experiences. I LOVE my job and I have a great time at it, but it's been hard for me to learn how not to bring the emotional part of it home with me but still be a compassionate care-giver - maybe not writing about it has been a way to cope with it. I've seen some really really sad cases. Some cases you want to yell and scream at people and ask them why they put themselves in the state of health they're in. Some people have just been dealt a crappy hand in life. Some people have been through the wringer and are still the happiest, most upbeat people you've met. Some people have life's equivalent of a paper cut and it's the end of the world. I've met the woman who beat breast cancer a few years ago and has been having regular checkups - the last one showed cancer in her brain, bones, abdomen, chest....she sent her oldest son off to Iraq the day she found out. She plans to fight and was always friendly and had a smile on her face. There was the 500+ pound 28 year old who stepped on her own leg and broke it. She was the biggest complainer and baby I've seen in a while. She would yell and the top of her lungs constantly that we weren't giving her enough pain killers. She'd have her mother call the nurses station and scream. She distracted you from every other patient and you just wanted to ignore her completely - it was really hard not to get angry that she let herself get like that. There's the local policeman with the rare cancer - he and his family were so nice and welcoming that even though he's no longer a patient in the hospital we still keep in touch and I'm keeping up with the progress he's making in his treatment. You get those patients that are too sick to move their tray, or need you to fluff their pillows becuase they're too short of breath, but God-forbid you try to keep them from wheeling their IV pumps out in the 30 degree weather so they can smoke. And don't forget those people that firmly insist your main purpose is to make sure they have a full pitcher of ice water. You get those people on the days you have some really really sick people that need the attention you're wasting on the whiners. You get tired, frustrated and angry and start taking it out on your co-workers, until you realize they're who's there to save your butt when you need help. You help someone take their last breath in comfort, help the family grieve, and respectfully prepare the body. You get stuck with needles and go through the worry and stress of blood work. That's what being a nurse is like...then one day you have a patient who's totally demented put her hand on your cheek and in a moment of lucidity tell you how beautiful your eyes are, or you help someone through something really difficult and actually get a heartfelt thank you. Or you have a day where you get everything done and have a chance to sit on the edge of a 98 year old's bed and chat. You talk about your wedding plans and she gives you advice on marriage that you know is coming from genuine experience, and just because you took the time she tells you you're like the daughter she never had. It's those moments that make all the bad stuff disappear. Most of all, it's about being able to help someone and see that you're making a difference right then and there. It's about meeting the good the bad and the ugly and knowing you've done everything in your power to make that person's life a little better, even if just for a little while. Being able to go to bed at night feeling good about what you're doing. That's what being a nurse is like.
Sunday, March 20, 2005
I got all my bloodwork back from my needlestick and I'm all good. Not that I thought I wouldn't be, but it's nervewracking, especially the HIV testing!! I was on nights all week, so I'm all screwed up with what day it is, let alone when I'm supposed to be awake versus asleep. At least I can catch up a little in the morning tomorrow since I'll be on evenings all week coming up.
Today we went up to the Gallaghers' neighborhood Easter party. A certain groom-to-be was the Easter Bunny, fuzzy pink tail and all! He was pretty funny, and made a great bunny. The kids (especially his) had no clue it was him. Check out the wedding photo album page - there are a few pictures.
Wednesday, May 4, 2005
Life comes full circle!! One year ago, I spent a week in Crozer's ER during my Leadership class. Today, I got assigned a Villanova 14 month program student at Crozer in her Leadership class! It was a good day - really good at showing me how far I really have come in the last year. I can remember being that tentative about what I was doing, and having all those questions - especially the ones about life after school...and today I was the one answering the questions and showing her what to do. A little surreal actually.
Wednesday, May 11, 2005 - Happy Birthday Vienna!
Last week Meyer and Madison went to the great fishtank in the sky, where they can eat all the little feeder fish and dried shrimp they want. We (Rick) put them out of their misery. We're waiting on a 75 gallon tank since they (Oscars) grow like crazy. Wilde has been living happily in a 20 gallon rubbermaid container for a while now, and we were hoping taking one of the three out of the 30 gallon tank would help and allow them to hold on until we get the 75 gallon tank, but Meyer and Madison just got too tank bound. At close to 7 inches each, a 30 gallon was too small. They had hole-in-the-head so bad they were bleeding from open sores. They didn't even put up a fight when Rick took them out of the water. I am not a big fan of those fish and I even cried. I had grown attached to them! We should have the bigger tank soon - the person that's giving it to us is upgrading to a 125 himself, so his new tank has to be up and running, and stable, before we can move the old one. Once that's up and running, we'll be adopting Robertson (who we'll call Bob) from my dad since there's no way an oscar can survive in Dad's 17 gallon tank for long. Dad's filter can't keep up with the bugger and the water's been green for weeks now. Once we have the new tank set up we're going to combine Preslee's 3 gallon into my 20 gallon (all tropicals) so we'll be down to two tanks in the house. So...hopefully soon all the family fish will be settled and happy again. Such drama!!
Thursday, May 19, 2005
I feel so out of touch with everyone...I haven't even seen Nikki in weeks and we used to see eachother almost every day. Some friends I haven't talked to in months, and I recently realized that there are some good friends I haven't seen in over a year!! Michelle J....it's been a year and a half!! Mindy....even longer I think!! That's insane!!! Life shouldn't be so busy...
Rick and I got the motorcycles this past weekend....neither of them runs. We're taking them in this weekend for tune ups and inspections and such - which means in the next two days I have to get insurance and change the title on mine and get tags. At least I got my learner's permit already. We did get our helmets though. They're so cool!!! Mine's silver, Rick's black. Top of the line, fiberglass, hand made to stand up to the strict European safety regulations. Can't put a price on your head, and I sure as hell know that!
Tonight at work I had one of those patients that reminds you why you are where you are in life. Most of my patients lately have been ok, and some have been downright pain in the butts, but this lady was incredible. She's 45 and in sickle cell crisis. To live to see 45 with sickle cell is pretty impressive. She told me she was diagnosed at 10 and has been in crisis about once every other month since then. I've only met sickle cell patients since I started working, and the few that I have met were completely drug seeking and sorry for themselves. I'm not in any way saying that I don't understand that it is a very very painful disease and these people weren't sick, but the people I've had contact with took advantage of that and were miserable about it all. This lady was different. She wass in pain, but she didn't complain. She asked for her pain medicine when she needed it, and always said thank you. She didn't snap and order you around. But that wasn't what struck me about her. She had such a wonderful outlook on life. She said she wasn't supposed to live this long and that life at this point was grace - and that when death came she would welcome it becuase it meant going home to God. She said she was blessed by every day but she was also so tired. She was spiritual and talked a lot about being blessed and loving God...and a lot of times I find people like that make me roll my eyes...but not this one. She was so simple and innocent about it, you knew she genuinely believed in what she was saying. You couldn't help but be drawn to her. I just had to spend some time talking to her. We talked about a lot of different things, and I had some questions for her about her disease. We also talked about life. She took my hand at one point and it was like she could see through me, right to my heart. She said a few things that blew me away - like she had known me personally for years. I actually asked her how she knew some of the stuff she said about me, and she said she could just see it. It was almost as if she was some sort of conduit for a message for me or something. She told me I knew what unconditional love was, that I had been through things and had proven that, that God knew, and would reward me. That my life had been through a hard time and she could see that, but that she knew it was getting better. I told her that she was right - and that life was so much better now and that I thought I was already being rewarded and she said there was more to come. Even now, reading back on this it sounds hokey - but it wasn't. It was a real connection, and it moved me - for those of you who have been through the last 7 years with me, you can understand why her words struck a cord. Sure, she could have just been saying that stuff, but it felt as if it was a connection on some different level. I left her room and tried to explain what had happened to a co-worker and I cried. I can't even explain it correctly now...and that's frustrating.
Sunday, May 22, 2005
So much for a relaxing weekend!! Saturday morning we were off early in the car to head up to the northeast for Preslee's Brownie Troop's "Rope Runner" contest and picnic. Home for a few hours and off to a party - which was great becuase I got to see my nursing school friends for the first time since graduation. Today was errands and just as we were winding down and relaxing we got a call that Preslee had fallen and hurt her arm...so we piled back in the car and drove back up to the northeast to take her to the hospital. Turns out she broke her arm...it was after 10 by the time we got back home - and then Rick got his car and drove back up so he could be there with her tonight and then take her to the orthopedist in the morning for the cast. Sheesh!! I'm heading into two weeks of overnights, so I'm not looking forward to it...but I think Rick and I will actually see more of eachother than when I'm working evenings becuase he'll wake me up when he gets home from work and we'll have a few hours before I have to leave for work. Ugh. Scheduling life like this is NO fun!!
Friday, June 17, 2005
Life is about to get a lot better. I applied for an got a job on my floor working every other weekend. That means I'm scheduled for 48 hours a month, and can pick up shifts whenever I want. I will be home during the week, so life won't be so exhausting. I can catch up on life. Go see Dad. Do some laundry and open some mail. Catch up with my friends. Plan the wedding. Breathe a little and not be so tired all the time. I am SO freaking excited!! Who'd thunk it - life is so different than just a few years ago. I'm truly blessed.
Monday, August 1, 2005
Ok, so I skipped July. Been just trying to get through until I go part time. One more week. Some people think I'm being lazy, and I've gotten more than a few comments about my financial status from people who know nothing about it, but I really don't think I should have to defend my decision to go part time at work. Truth be told, I'm really really really lucky. I'm really looking forward to spending some time catching up on life, and enjoying it, instead of running through it and missing everything. It's been a busy summer...Mom's been in Taiwan, Beirut and is in Russia now. She comes home and is home two weeks before we head to Maine. Rick's down the shore with his family - I'm literally the ONLY one not there. I'm dog-sitting Rylee, and Balu loves having the playmate. Tires him out! Wedding plans are coming along - we're starting to get into the litter stuff now. Music's the only big thing left - photography, flowers, reception, even the invitations are done. Now if we could just get the guest list to a liveable amount of people.
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Congratulations to Bob on his acceptance to Penn's Master's of Environmental Sciences program! He stars in a few weeks. Yay!! Around here, I've been trying to catch up on life now that I'm part time. Haven't gotten too far yet. Had Preslee for a week, then went camping for a weekend. Now we have about eight times the laundry to do, but I'm getting there. I worked my first weekend - 24 hours in two days. The first day was hellish, but the second wasn't so bad. Very doable with the time off in between. I'm up again this weekend, working overnights so we'll see how I do. We head to Maine as soon as I get off work on Monday morning, so I'll sleep in the car. We got the kitten - her name is Frankie since she's got blue eyes like Sinatra. She's a little spunky one...got quite the personality. Check out the pictures. As for the wedding, we got the invitations, and had our first tasting which was awesome!! I'm getting so excited!! I'm updating the wedding page too, so be sure to check it out.
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
What a whirlwind few weeks! I worked overnights on my birthday, and the next morning jumped in the car for the drive up to Maine. Mom and Rick drove, I slept. Needless to say it was the fastest trip to Maine I can remember. Maine was incredible - the weather was gorgeous and it was a great week. Rick discovered sea fishing and spent the whole week down on the rocks. Check out the pictures page for the pic of a huge striped bass he got.
As you all know, Katrina hit about that time, and I had a talk with Mom and Rick about going down and volunteering. I got information when I got home and got information and was all set to head to Alabama with the Red Cross. Mom donated frequent flyer miles for me, and Rick took me out and helped me get geared up for whatever I might face. Yesterday, I was getting packed and all ready to head to Alabama today, when I got a phone call from the Red Cross today asking me to postpone my trip. Apparently they have an influx of volunteers at the moment and have decided that they need to postpone some so they're not stuck when the people currently deployed finish up. I'm still going, just not for a few weeks. The other interesting tidbit I found out, is that they've become the deployment center for the entire Gulf Coast region, so when I do go, I can be deployed anywhere - Louisiana, Mississippi, or Alabama. So, I'm a little disappointed since I was all geared up to go, but the plane ticket is on hold and as soon as I get the call I'll be on my way south. Thank you so much to all of you for your kind words and wishes. I'll carry them with me in a few weeks!
To get my mind off being disappointed at not going, Rick took me out on the motorcycle for the first time last night - I did ok - actually got it up and riding, even if I did "drop" it twice. I have a few nasty bruises on my leg, but I'm ready to get back on and keep practicing!
Tuesday, November 8, 2005
Wow - been almost two months since my last post. I've gone part time at work, and I'm sooo much happier. The group of women I work with on my weekend are really great - I look forward to going into work. It was definitely a really good move for me. Wedding planning is coming along, and I've even had a bridal shower - mom's friends threw it and it was really great! It's all a bit surreal, but it's really going to be here before I know it. Less than 10 weeks!! Rick's been pretty stressed out with work and hockey stuff lately, but he's doing well. I'm up to my eyeballs in wedding favors and stuff, so I certainly keep busy. Don't forget to check out the new pictures on the family page!!
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Ok so I haven't update in quite a while!! I had to totally reformat my computer so everything had to start over from scratch - there were issues with the web software, so it's been a while, but we're finally up and running again. Dad's 8 year anniversary was the other day, and every year I am totally struck by how far he's come. He told me this year that it wasn't something to celebrate, but I really think we need to celebrate how far he's come. It's really amazing. There are still major shortcomings, but the progress he's made is completely amazing. I am so proud of him.
The wedding is 5 weeks away!! I can't believe it's all happening and all real. There's still so much to do, but there's so much done and everything seems to be falling into place. This is going to be SOME party!!! I can't wait - I wish it would hurry up and get here, but at the same time I really don't want to wish it away becuase I know it'll be over before I know it.
